Thursday, July 15, 2010

Take Some Advice From Comedians

Dear Summer of 2010: I find your lack of filmic awesomeness disturbing. Hopefully Inception will not disappoint.


I've been getting into recreational hating recently. Louis C. K. turned me on to it. It really is a great way to kill time. I arrived early to my meeting with my advisor and got the chance to hate one of those guys who talks really loud so everyone around him can hear the brilliant things he's saying. The guy was talking to a girl, who I'll refer to as Eyeshadow, because that's all her personality seemed to consist of. Eyeshadow was sitting four inches away from Loud Dude, but he was yelling like he was trying to talk to her over the sound of a thousand drag races. And he said things like, 'See, our minds are so complicated. We each have more than one side to us.' I know what you're thinking: well, that's not so bad, we've all said that at some point or another. But that's exactly my point. This guy said it as if he were revealing his grand unified theory to an eager audience. Man, I just wanted to read my book. Then again, maybe it's not his fault. Maybe he's got some kind of problem, because then he and Eyeshadow started making out, and he made some of the loudest groaning and slurping noises I've ever heard come out of a guy, drunk or sober.
Also, is it just me, or is it weird to sit in a coffee shop for more than an hour sucking face? I'm not against PDA in principle, but don't these people have anywhere else to go? Somewhere more private, maybe? Somewhere where strangers who are trying to quietly sip a drink don't have to listen to what sounds like a face hugger with a sinus infection?

15 comments:

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